Claire (not her real name) had been coming to see me professionally for about 20 years and during that time we had become firm friends. It is a wonderful experience to be able to embrace a person’s journey – to see them get married and have children – to watch them grow spiritually.
My work with Claire was to help her realise that her mind loved dramas and above all else to notice what her mind was repeatedly telling her and not to believe it at all. The theory was that it was the left side of her brain – the computer side in which was stored all her ideas, programming and beliefs that was ‘talking’ to her. Her belief included that her children and husband couldn’t manage without her and she needed to control everything to get things ‘right’, so of course, everything that didn’t go ‘just right’ became a drama of varying proportions. Most of which she couldn’t let go of and so she spent days upset. Her biggest fear was breast cancer.
In spite of all her ‘hard work’ meditating and trying to ‘let go’ her upsetting negative thoughts, she still found life difficult and had dramas and at the age of 50 she developed breast cancer. Research has shown that there is a link between unresolved negative emotions and cancer.
Claire did chemotheraphy and radiotheraphy and was said to be clear of the cancer but only 10 months later it reappeared. This time she decided not to tell her children as her eldest was doing her final year of high school. I have never known anyone to show as much courage as Claire did. She did everything to stay alive that year so her daughter could finish her exams. She went shopping, made her daughter’s dress for her formal, cooked meals, ran the house as normal so nothing would disturb the children’s studies. She was in pain but you would never know. She didn’t take the morphine the doctor gave her as she said that she found it muddled her head and she couldn’t drive. She saw many therapists and I agreed with her when she told me that one therapist said to her “Claire, it is your mind that is causing all the trouble.”
Claire rang me on Friday morning to say she couldn’t make her appointment that day for she felt she needed to go to hospital. She died on Monday. I was devastated. I really felt that somehow she would beat the cancer because I had ‘seen’ her ‘teaching’ us with the new knowledge that having cancer had given her.
It was on Wednesday, just two days after she had passed away, that she came to me. She had on a smart dress, like the one she wore to work, but she appeared flustered. Her voice was slightly aggressive as she addressed me, “Rosemary”, she said, “I look just the same, why can’t they see me”. “Because you haven’t got a physical body anymore,” was my answer and she was gone.
The next time she appeared she explained, “I can’t leave, how on earth are they going to manage without me?” and once again she was gone. Where, I wondered.
It was a couple of months later when I experienced my next contact. Her energy was much softer, gentler and there seemed to be a radiance around her. Her body no longer appeared to be solid.
“Rosemary, is it alright if I speak with you?” she asked. At first I wasn’t sure if it was her. I had to check if with my spiritual guidance. “Yes, it is quite alright”, I replied.
“I want to share with you about what is happening to me, what I have been doing. It is amazing what I am learning. Do you want to hear?” Of course I did!
“Well,” she continued, “I go to classes, only it is nothing like the classes we have in school or Uni. Firstly, the building reminds me of a Grecian Temple, for it has a lot of carved pillars and inside there was Aristotle, Hippocrates and another Greek scholar. But Rosemary, they didn’t talk in words, they made sounds and the knowledge was contained in the sounds they were making. It was a bit weird because I understood everything they were ‘saying’.”
“And what I have learnt that I would like to pass onto everyone is that it is not the negative thoughts, not the words themselves that kill you it is the sound they make.”
“The important thing to learn is that: SOUND CAN CREATE OR DESTROY.”
Thank you, beloved friend it seems that you are teaching us after all.